I’ve realized after traveling with other people, as well as taking a couple small solo trips, that my husband Jasper is truly my favorite person to travel with. Ugh, so mushy, I know. I am NOT a super mushy person, so this feels like a lot coming from me. So traveling as a couple is definitely my preferred way to go. Maybe its the fact that we’ve been together for over half our lives at this point? (How was 2007 really that long ago?!) We just get each other: we enjoy the same things, love trying new foods and drinks, and both prefer to travel over vacationing.

Travel vs. Vacation

Traveling is about the destination – sightseeing, exploring, etc. Vacationing is about relaxation.

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Pros and Cons to Couples Trips

I wish I could be a solo-travel girl. There are so many places I want to see, and I have a whole lot more free time than my husband does. I’m all about it when it comes to cities I’m familiar with, but for new places I need my husband as a comfort/emotional support blanket. That being said, there are definitely pros and cons to traveling as a couple vs solo travel.

Pros:

• As someone who doesn’t really like doing things alone, its great having a built-in travel partner!
• There’s nothing better than getting to experience new places with your favorite person – creating new memories and trying new things.
• Are you a foodie? Traveling with another person means being able to try more dishes/drinks since you can each order something different.
• Its generally safer to travel in pairs/a group. I’ve solo-traveled a couple times, and I don’t necessarily mind doing it. But as a petite woman, I just feel a little more secure with more people.
• Sometimes you get in a rut in your home life, and traveling to a new place helps to change things up! I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve realized we’d done nothing all week but watch tv, scroll social media on our phones, and hang out with no one but each other/our cats.

Cons:

• Like most people, we’re usually exhausted after long travel days. Unfortunately that sometimes leads to being short with each other. Honestly this could be true for any travel group.
• You’re not always going to be on the same page. It could be a bigger thing – like not agreeing on where you want to go – or something as simple as being on different eating schedules. A prime example: the start of our Italy trip. While in Venice, Jasper had stomach issues and didn’t really want to eat, and then of course things were reversed when we got to Milan. Small things out of the other person’s control can lead to frustration.
• You end up with mostly individual photos, or LOTS of couples selfies. I’m not the kind of person to ask a stranger to take photos of us. I’m also too paranoid to put my phone down and use a timer, worried my it will be stolen. Jasper also isn’t great at taking photos of people (most importantly, of me). So there’s lots of pictures of him on our travels, not so many of me. Its a work in progress.
• You may not be the same kind of traveler. Maybe one of you is an early riser, and the other likes to sleep in. Or one likes to relax while on vacation while the other wants to see as much as possible in a short time. Thankfully we don’t have this issue!

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Tips for Traveling as a Couple

–Communication is key. Your spouse/partner isn’t a mind reader. Let them know if you’re feeling overwhelmed/hungry/overheated/etc. to go along with that, be patient with the other person when they’re feeling that way.

–Try to pick places you both want to go. This seems pretty obvious, but unfortunately I’ve heard plenty of instances where people only consider what they want to do. Usually you’re in a relationship because you have at least SOME interests in common. So realistically it shouldn’t be all that difficult to find activities/restaurants you’ll both enjoy. Only ever doing what one of you wants to do can lead to resentment from the other person in the long run. Which leads me to…

–Compromise is sometimes necessary. Sometimes the other person is going to want to do things that you don’t, or vice versa. Things don’t always have to be done your way (I have a really hard time with this sometimes. What can I say, I’m a Leo and think I’m always right 😅). For example: I LOVE checking out bookstores and huge libraries, while Jasper could care less. And because he doesn’t complain about going to those, I tag along to the car or helicopter museums that bore me to death. Can’t come to an agreement? Maybe building some solo time into your trip is your best bet.

–Set aside some solo time. Can’t come to an agreement on what to do? Starting to run out of things to talk about, or just getting frustrated with each other? Maybe building some solo time into your trip is the way to go. Spend a few hours pursuing your solo interests, and then meet up for a romantic dinner or something couple-related later. I got this idea from my sister-in-law, who is a big proponent of alone time on trips. Give yourselves time to miss each other/recharge, and also have new things to talk about later. Its a win-win! The idea of doing something by myself in a foreign city/country makes me a little nervous, but somewhere I’m at least a little familiar with? I might have to try it out.

–Talk about your budget/trip expectations ahead of time. Make sure you’re on the same page with how much you want to spend and what style of trip you want it to be (vacation vs travel). You don’t want to wait until you’re already on your trip to discover one of you made reservations to splurge on a Michelin Star restaurant, while the other assumed you’d be sticking to fast-casual dinners. Or one of you wanted to lay on the beach for most of the trip, while the other thought you’d spend the time sightseeing/being active.

Do you prefer solo, couple, or group travel? Let me know in the comments!